These are a couple of poems I wrote during a long research stay in China in 2010. That was my first trip to China since 2006.
Transformation. No hesitation.
Movement. No place to rest.
Forward, always forward.
No rewards for looking back.
Destiny? Circle? Clash?
Change bigger than our imagination.
Rollercoaster in every direction.
People who are moving.
End in sight? Future crashes? Can’t be?
No matter what.
Beijing is moving. One direction. West.
Imagine a quiet place.
Green. Full of Sunshine.
A glimpse of sea air. Blue sky.
Loneliness within people.
A different place. Noisy.
Grey-Green. Controlled Sunshine.
Enough air to breath.
Endless stream of houses.
Unity with exceptions.
Hearts without knowledge.
Obvious differences, hidden obstacles.
Curiosity lacking meaning.
No reciprocity without risks.
Space. Territory. Sovereignty.
Threesomes in Asia. Spatial Turns.
Rewriting Political Geography.
One World. Melting Boundaries.
East. West. North. South.
Continents. Regions. States.
Conceptual Traps covering truth.
Sunshine. It touches my heart.
Walking. Away or just forward.
It is what you do. Here.
But where to?
No straight feelings, just satisfaction.
Sunshine. It touches my skin.
Half-awake. Still moving.
Into the shadow. No loophole.
It is more about everything than nothing.
But nothing is something before it is
everything. So? Feelings are painful.
Waiting in a tin box, they attempt to hit you
in the back. Looking over my shoulder, I
see them hiding. I am waiting for rain.
I cannot see.
Talking to my back he tells me about the
pain and the places, he wants to go. Nothing
else to see, only something to feel and the
pain never stops. So? Without suffering no
passion. My heart is wandering and I am
still looking back until it is all quiet and I
am finally alone again.
My soul is searching for you
under the sheets of our intimacy
My body is yearning for
even more closeness
Quietness encloses my heart
Peacefully listening. Cold Sunrise
Though my heart still glows
Beating from inside to outside
My mind is just illusionary
blinded by your thoughts
My hands longing for you
with closed eyes.
Craziness surrounds my appearance
Ignoring the vibes not possible
Knowing life is taking us apart
We breathe through this moment
Reality, Rationalism, Mirrors.
Impossibilities necessary while the body
still fights drunken feelings.
Places, Moments, Smells. Constant
Reminders of different times.
Bodies intoxicated by memories.
Staggering. Captured in-between. Thinking
of a beautiful dream one last time before
Pain catches the heart.
Loneliness. Feelings of disturbance.
Separation. Necessary decisions. In the end
only silence and tears.
Copyright by Nadine Godehardt