Beijing

These are a couple of poems I wrote during a long research stay in China in 2010. That was my first trip to China since 2006.

I

Magnificent change.

Transformation. No hesitation.

Movement. No place to rest.

Forward, always forward.

No rewards for looking back.

Destiny? Circle? Clash?

Still moving.

Change bigger than our imagination.

Rollercoaster in every direction.

People who are moving.

End in sight? Future crashes? Can’t be?

No matter what.

Beijing is moving. One direction. West.

II

Imagine a quiet place.

Green. Full of Sunshine.

A glimpse of sea air. Blue sky.

Endless view.

Respectful Silence.

Loneliness within people.

A different place. Noisy.

Grey-Green. Controlled Sunshine.

Enough air to breath.

Endless stream of houses.

Ignorant noise.

Unity with exceptions.

Hearts without knowledge.

Pending misunderstandings.

Obvious differences, hidden obstacles.

Curiosity lacking meaning.

Still

No reciprocity without risks.

III

Space. Territory. Sovereignty.

Threesomes in Asia. Spatial Turns.

Desperate needs.

Rewriting Political Geography.

One World. Melting Boundaries.

East. West. North. South.

Continents. Regions. States.

Conceptual Traps covering truth.

Nothing more.

IV

Sunshine. It touches my heart.

Walking. Away or just forward.

Keep moving.
It is what you do. Here.

But where to?

No straight feelings, just satisfaction.

Sunshine. It touches my skin.

Half-awake. Still moving.

Where to?

Into the shadow. No loophole.

V

It is more about everything than nothing.

But nothing is something before it is

everything. So? Feelings are painful.

Waiting in a tin box, they attempt to hit you

in the back. Looking over my shoulder, I

see them hiding. I am waiting for rain.

I cannot see.

Talking to my back he tells me about the

pain and the places, he wants to go. Nothing

else to see, only something to feel and the

pain never stops. So? Without suffering no

passion. My heart is wandering and I am

still looking back until it is all quiet and I

am finally alone again.

VI

Silent agreement

My soul is searching for you
under the sheets of our intimacy
My body is yearning for
even more closeness

Quietness encloses my heart
Peacefully listening. Cold Sunrise
Though my heart still glows
Beating from inside to outside

My mind is just illusionary
blinded by your thoughts
My hands longing for you
with closed eyes.

Craziness surrounds my appearance
Ignoring the vibes not possible
Knowing life is taking us apart
We breathe through this moment

VII

Reality, Rationalism, Mirrors.

Impossibilities necessary while the body

still fights drunken feelings.

Places, Moments, Smells. Constant

Reminders of different times.

Bodies intoxicated by memories.

Staggering. Captured in-between. Thinking

of a beautiful dream one last time before

Pain catches the heart.

Loneliness. Feelings of disturbance.

Separation. Necessary decisions. In the end

only silence and tears.

Copyright by Nadine Godehardt